Opinion

As time passes I find that most people I meet, do business with or have a social encounter with are disappointing. Most seem to be very interested in being busy and highlighting how they are doing something of merit (as defined by whatever they are doing IS the thing of merit). But, I've realized this especially when talking to people that consider themselves as younger. Albeit time stands still for no one. Those that lack an opinion are of particular - er'ugh - irritation. They are part of problems. They occupy time and energy and then end up not on the fence but somehow elevating themselves from life. Not in it and living but making excuses as to why they are irritating. They are, simply, obstacles. This is not to say someone needs to be agreeing with me or the flow. Or disagreeing. But that they have ideas and have purcolated thoughts based on something to do with the issues. To say they tolerate is to just compound the issue with arrogance. We certainly don't need more self proclaimed gods tolerating others. So, well, I advocate having an opinion and making an effort to articulate it and willingness to challenge others and be challenged with grace.

Found the following from this source: Robert J. Gula, Nonsense: Red Herrings, Straw Men and Sacred Cows: How We Abuse Logic in Our Everyday Language, Axios Press, 2007, pages 2-4. It is a lengthy quotation, but one that captures much of the coffee-shop approach to conversation. See what you think.

[A] description of patterns that seem to characterize the ways that people tend to respond and think. For example, people: 
1. tend to believe what they want to believe.
2. tend to project their own biases or experiences upon situations
3. tend to generalize from a specific event.
4. tend to get personally involved in the analysis of an issue and tend to let their feelings overcome a sense of objectivity.
5. are not good listeners. They hear selectively. They often hear only what they want to hear.
6. are eager to rationalize.
7. are often unable to distinguish what is relevant from what is irrelevant.
8. are easily diverted from the specific issue at hand.
9. are usually unwilling to explore thoroughly the ramifications of a topic; tend to oversimplify.
10. often judge from appearances. They observe something, misinterpret what they observe, and make terrible errors in judgment.
11. often simply don’t know what they are talking about, especially in matters of general discussion. They rarely think carefully before they speak, but they allow their feelings, prejudices, biases, likes, dislikes, hopes, and frustrations to supersede careful thinking.
12. rarely act according to a set of consistent standards. Rarely do they examine the evidence and then form a conclusion. Rather, they tend to do whatever they want to do and to believe whatever they want to believe and then find whatever evidence will support their actions or beliefs. They often think selectively: in evaluating a situation they are eager to find reasons to support what they want to support and they are just as eager to ignore or disregard reasons that don’t support what they want. 
13. often do not say what they mean and often do not mean what they say.

To these principles, let’s add four observations cited by J. A. C. Brown in his Techniques of Persuasion:

“Most people want to feel that issues are simple rather than complex, want to have their prejudices confirmed, want to feel that they ‘belong’ with the implication that others do not, and need to pinpoint an enemy to blame for their frustrations.”

The above comments may seem jaundiced. They are not meant to be. They are not even meant to be critical or judgmental. They merely suggest that it is a natural human tendency to be subjective rather than objective and that the untrained mind will usually take the path of least resistance. The path of least resistance is rarely through reason.

Entered last year running and finished it running. It was a year to have in history. Much heartache and many people lost. Dark times.

I vow to drink more wine in 2013. To share it with a friend and even an occasional relative. I vow, try try try, to speak positively more often. This doesn't mean I'm going to appoglize for or make nice when others are just being crap! Better to walk away and let them impress their two-dimensional selves. 

There are remarkably wonderful compassionate people out there. They have great stories, laughter and emotion. I know some of these people, treasure these people. Some are friends. I'll share my vino with them while we have the time. 

I think I was called a nihilist today.

Not me, exactly, but rather a reference to "art-nihilism". Yes, I should know if I heard the words (or read them). I know art all around me - hear, feel and see it! Can't imagine living without the joy of art. But, the art I know is  not always hung on a wall or verified by expert appraisal.

Possibly the remark didn't matter anyway.
Eh, it doesn't make any difference!